Article by John L. Payne
It has been observed many times than when the 'good' celebrate their triumph over the 'bad', they in their turn often mimic the 'bad', and usually with more enthusiasm.
This can be seen in society as a whole and also within family systems. When the 'righteous' impose their self proclaimed higher standards upon everyone in order to promote peace, what they are really saying is that there can only be peace when every does, says and thinks as they do. Whenever any idea, concept or movement becomes a crusade, perpetrator energy emerges within it, no matter the original intention.
Whether our statement is 'better than father', 'better than mother' or 'better than this or that group' there is no room for healing any of the wounds that have materialised within such relationships. Likewise, when we feel that it our job to bestow forgiveness upon another, the same dynamic emerges, the 'good' triumphing over the 'bad'. This only leads to more wounding and the prolongation of suffering.
We do not have it within our power to force anyone to give us the love and recognition we feel is rightfully ours, the only thing that is within our power is to recognise and honour limitations from a place of being equal to the wounding that has taken place. When we engage others as equals, as fellow members of the human race, then something special can enter and be present with us - the presence of grace. The presence of grace allows us to reach the greater part of ourselves and helps us to move beyond the 'little me' that has a list of demands, perhaps needing retribution, apologies or recognition. When we allow 'little me' to govern and steer our lives, we often find ourselves holding ourselves hostage to a relationship or a wound for years, even decades. Most often the 'others' are not even aware of our wounding and our hurts.
As we enter the greater field through Family Constellation work, we can address our disruptive life patterns and find our connection to all of life again, more easily allowing the blessings to flow to us.
4 Feb 2011
Article/Information supplied by John L. Payne
Disclaimer - Any general advice given in any article should not be relied upon and should not be taken as a substitute for visiting a qualified medical Doctor.